Divorce- the sad truth and how to recover from it

Two hearts meet each other. During the meetings, they start feeling that they have made for each other. They see many sweet sweet dreams for the future. Spend lots of time with each other. They don’t want to separate even for a minute. Then the day come they talk to their parents for their marriage. Their parents don’t agree. The two love birds leave their parents home and themselves get married in the court.

It is really difficult to start a married life without the support of the parents. But they both were well educated. They start the new journey with full joy. Many obstacles come in their life. They both were doing jobs. They both were hardworking. Their life was full of happiness. After a year, their parents also called them back. This was the time when both of them were happy that their parents had no complaints with them. Their married life was going on right track according to the lady.

One day she got shocked when she saw her husband holding a hand of some other woman in the market.

She thought that that women might be her husband’s cousin whom she didn’t know. Actually she loved her husband so heartly that could not doubt him. At night when she asked him about that woman, he completely ignored his wife and try to escape. Again many months gone. After 7 months, she again saw that lady with her husband. She was not understanding that why her husband is escaping from telling her about that lady. She made a mind for enquiring about. When the truth came before her she was not able to do faith on truth. She got fainted like.

Darkness spread before her eyes. She was weeping continuously. She was thinking that her life had been finished. Nothing was left. She was all alone. She could not able to tell her parents anything because she did marriage against them. All the ways go to her happy life work closed. She was completely broken and could not understand her mistake and gave him love with all her heart but why he did so, it was confusing to her.

She was thinking that how could she live with him after knowing the truth.

What should be her next step? Should she take a divorce? It was really a very difficult time for her. Her senses were not working. She wanted to talk to her parents but could not. Then she thought of talking to her friend.

Her friend made her mind to go to the parents and take their advice. She agreed to it. When her parents heard about the deceive, they called the lawyer and send the divorce notice to her husband. Her husband was surprised when she came to know about the truth?He also got ready for the separation. It was perhaps relaxing for him but it was the deep wound for her.

Itwas the issue of divorce. Everyone was consoling her but she needed the help to get out of the time and start a new life. Everyone was saying to forget him but whom she loved so much by heart and spend so many years, how could it be possible for her to forget.

How to recover yourself from the pain of divorce

Help from CBT-she was broken from heart. At that time a person told her about cognitive behaviour therapy. This therapy help the person in converting the negative behaviour into positive behaviour. Step-by-step it changes the mind of the victim and show her the way of brightness.

First step Understand your feelings-

The feelings of heartbroken is different for everyone. Some gets deceive from their husband and some gets from the boyfriend and some from there own well wishers. But the case of divorce is different. It hurts so much that the victim may not be able to stand. She has to face her relatives and Society. A society takes out the fault of lady only so a lady faces so much of problems and issues which are unbearable. Women cannot give space to any other woman. The same problem was with her. She was not ready to accept her husband to marry another woman but she had to accept the truth. CBT helped her to give the name to her feelings. She gave-disappointment, afraid,irritation and sadness.

Second step – Behind the feelings-

It was the second step what was behind her feelings. It was an important part in moving on to new life. She was afraid, irritated, sad and disappointed. She was sad because her husband had not given her value. And was disappointed because he had not fulfilled his promises. And was afraid because she was feeling alone and how would she spend her left life without him. She had left her confidence. She was feeling defeated. When she sent him a divorce notice, he not even once came to talk to her but she had always given him so much importance. He never made her felt valuable for him.She enquired all her feellings when CBT was given to her.

Third step- Leave your negativity

She knew her negativity. She had to get out of it. The third step was aimed at giving a series to every feelings. When she started thinking deeply she tried to understand each of her feelings. She thought deeply about her disappointment, afraid, sadness and angreness. During the analysis she came to understand that she waited for her husband but he never gave any response.

She gave him importance even more than herself. She even understood that her husband was also getting weak while deceiving her that’s why he used to spend more time out of the house. And she understood that she was not important for him.

So not responsible for it, he only was responsible. She was not guilty in any case. She fulfilled all her responsibilities honestly.When she analysed her negativity she felt relaxed that she was really not responsible for the break up.

Fourth step -Be soft with yourself

There is no lady who doesn’t think responsible for break up. Every man lays the blame to the women for breakups and ladies even think herself responsible for it but it’s not true. When two matured,educated and sensible person marry each other then the responsibility of maintaining the relationship depends upon both of them. Then how can only women be blamed for it? When this thing came to a mind she was feeling her relaxed from the depression of being divorced.

Fifth step – move on

Now the step came when she had to move on. She had got relief from all the guiltiness. First of all she blocked her husband’s phone number and separated herself from his Facebook account. She was ready to live her life without him.

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